I first spoke to Charlie at the end of 2019 as I felt overwhelmed being Mum to my two young boys and due to circumstances I was doing it most of the time alone. I’d read every parenting book going and Gentle Parenting massively resonated with me but I felt I was anything but that. I struggled with my own emotions and how to manage them and fully recognised that how I was behaving was influencing how my boys would behave, however I had information overload and put far too much pressure on myself to be the “perfect” mum. As a result my energy was either super low or 0-100 in seconds. I knew this wasn’t healthy and that things needed to change but I just didn’t know how. We had a short session where she gave me lots of tips but then the Pandemic hit and this was all put on the back burner as I didn’t feel I had the capacity to follow it up. With my husband working full time throughout the whole pandemic, looking after 2 young boys alone during lockdown, home-schooling and supporting my mum as a carer for my nan with Dementia you can imagine where I was at come January 2021.
One day I was sitting on the sofa all despondent, my husband had taken the boys out to give me space and I did some soul searching. I had the realisation that I cannot keep living in this circle of despair – only I can make things better and I had to take charge to get out of this negative mind-set. Before I could change my mind I messaged Charlie and we had a session almost immediately. I can honestly say it is the best thing I have ever done!
Before you even get started Charlie has THE MOST calming influence. In my first session I talked about how my biggest concern was how disconnected I felt from my boys – very quickly I understood that actually I was disconnected from myself. Over years and years I’d gradually “fallen asleep” to myself as a self-preservation mechanism - I’d shut down my feelings as a way of coping with what the world threw at me. As a result I’d often struggle to feel and articulate my emotions but Charlie would always help me figure it all out with gentle questioning and feedback. The podcasts, songs or readings she would send me afterwards would always give me food for thought and Charlie always encourages time for reflection which was where I learnt the most about myself. Charlie taught me how to be more open to really feel my feelings and understand what they were trying to tell me. I learnt that all feelings (including anger which was my biggest concern) were ok. I just needed to listen and understand my feelings and simply accept them or think about what I wanted to do about them – how I react to my feelings determines how I manage situations and subsequently how it affects me and those around me. Fundamentally I went to Charlie as I wanted to change, but actually she showed me that I didn’t need to change, I just needed to accept who I am and concentrate on giving myself the time, tools and mind-set to be the best version of myself. I could talk all day about everything Charlie has shown me and how she has guided me – I feel like this is only the beginning as I will continue to practice and develop what I have learnt, but I can honestly say that Charlie has helped me transform my life and both myself and my family are reaping the benefits of this better version of me.
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